Will the real Bravie, please stand up

Ya'll really outdid yourselves this time. *applause*

So here's the deal. As you know I have been having a difficult time of late. Some I can post about, some I choose not to post about and some I can't post about. It's been a frustrating year. With some of my frustrations, I have no control. With some, I do. So I made a decision earlier this week to eliminate frustrations where I could in order to better deal with those that I can not control. That resulted in me deciding to leave OT and to fade out blogland. OT has been an escape for me for the past 3 1/2 or 4 years and blogland for about the past year or two. Unfortunately, two new people over on OT have made that place very frustrating and unfun for me. I know that I should just ignore them and not allow them to ruin my time there but they seem to be EVERYWHERE. And so it's just easier for me to walk away from that place. There are plenty of peeps over there who I don't care for and who I can ignore so I don't know what makes these two different. In any event, I allow them to taint my fun over there and so I see no reason to be in a place where I don't have fun.

Even though I know that OT and the Blogs are two different places, I still sort of connect the two. And so I had decided that if I was going to leave OT, I would also leave blogland. I figured that if peeps in blogland where real friends, then leaving OT and blogs would not affect those friendships and nothing would be lost.

I had completely stopped going to OT since Wednesday and had only sparcely checked blogs since then as well. And then I clicked on a blog and noticed that it was similar to mine. Then I got an email from someone saying how funny (insert two names) were for altering their blogs. Two names? So I ran off to the second blog. *snort* It also was similar to my blog. And then a third blog was titled "Is it blonde, or blond?". And then a fourth and a fifth and so on and so on. And then they became more elaborate. And then I suddenly found myself clicking on blogs all over the place. And suddenly I got it. OT and Blogland were two completely different places.

OT is the kind of place where, if you are feeling low you ask people to cheer you up. You ask people to pump your ego. You ask people to make you feel important. You ask people to love you. And in my mind, when you have to ask, you just never know if it is sincere or not. I am not a fan of false compliments nor am I a fan of fishing for compliments and false endearments. You can bet that if I tell you that I care about you and if I pay you a compliment, that I mean it. I prefer the same in return.

I learned the difference between OT and Blogland yesterday. I never once asked any of you to cheer me up. I didn't ask you to tell me that you cared about me. I didn't ask you to ask me to stay around. I simply stated that I was having a bad time right now and that I may be absent for a bit. YOU took it upon yourself, in a most creative way, to let me know that I am cared about and loved and lvoed. And it has made a world of difference to me. I have friends who care about me and who went to great lengths to let me know so. The fact that you did this without me feeling as if I had to beg you to let me know that you cared means more than any words that I can put here. For that, I sincerely and from the bottom of my heart thank you. I'm not willing to explain here but it ties into some things that I had planned on thinking about this weekend. Some things that were part of my thought process about whether or not to step away for good. I've learned that although I may be able to walk away from OT for good ( I haven't decided yet), I can't walk away from Blogland. Because I have friends here. Real friends. And one could only hope in their lifetime to have such wonderful friends. And for that, I thank you and Love you. *happy, speechless sigh*