Oh My!!!!
*Sets up scene*
So I'm in the bathroom. I'm sitting there taking care of business and mid stream I look up. Something catches my eye. I focus in on it and HOLY FUCK!!! it's a spider. On the wall. Right next to me. I contemplate a midstream jump and decide against it. Immediately my heart starts to pound, I press on my blatter and I start to gag. I have a terrible gag reflex when it comes to spiders. I finish my business, jump to the right to avoid contact, then pull up my pants, wash my hands and run out of the bathroom. My eyes are watering and I am gagging. The bathroom is right here in the front office. So as I exit, all of my coworkers see me. And one says "That's pretty bad that you made your own self gag, I'm avoiding that bathroom" *SNORT*
I grab "stupid boy" and tell him that I need him in the bathroom. He says "please don't make me clean up an overflowed toilet. Especially if it's so bad that it made you gag yourself"
ROFLMAO. I tell him there is a tarantula on the wall and he needs to kill it. He enters, looks around, looks around again. He can't find it. OMG, panic. How can I go in there again if it has disappeared? I walk in and there it is. Staring at us thought it's scary spider eyes. How could he miss it? It took up almost the entire wall. *sigh* He killed it. He says it was the size of half a pencil eraser. I say it was a tarantula. *gag*
So I'm in the bathroom. I'm sitting there taking care of business and mid stream I look up. Something catches my eye. I focus in on it and HOLY FUCK!!! it's a spider. On the wall. Right next to me. I contemplate a midstream jump and decide against it. Immediately my heart starts to pound, I press on my blatter and I start to gag. I have a terrible gag reflex when it comes to spiders. I finish my business, jump to the right to avoid contact, then pull up my pants, wash my hands and run out of the bathroom. My eyes are watering and I am gagging. The bathroom is right here in the front office. So as I exit, all of my coworkers see me. And one says "That's pretty bad that you made your own self gag, I'm avoiding that bathroom" *SNORT*
I grab "stupid boy" and tell him that I need him in the bathroom. He says "please don't make me clean up an overflowed toilet. Especially if it's so bad that it made you gag yourself"
ROFLMAO. I tell him there is a tarantula on the wall and he needs to kill it. He enters, looks around, looks around again. He can't find it. OMG, panic. How can I go in there again if it has disappeared? I walk in and there it is. Staring at us thought it's scary spider eyes. How could he miss it? It took up almost the entire wall. *sigh* He killed it. He says it was the size of half a pencil eraser. I say it was a tarantula. *gag*
29 Comments:
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You kill me Carey.
I'd have the same reaction, minus the gagging.
LOL at office boy thinking you had stunk up the bathroom LOL LOL LOL LOL!!!!
Tarrantula ... *SNORT* I'm exactly the same way when describing spiders to DH. It was HUGE, with hairy legs and big beady eyes!!
LOL. Remind me not to tell you the story about the clump of Soda Pop fur that my mom *insisted* was spider eggs. *shudder*
*itch*
I hate you.
Wuss.
I have decided that I am not coming to your blog anymore.
The first 2 lines had me thinking the ghost visited again.
Ack!!!!!!!!! runs from bathroom. NO, I would not watch that movie. I would spend two hours gagging and throwing up. Waaaaaaah.
ROFLMAO! What is it with you, spiders, and the bathroom? Did you ever watch the movie Arachnaphobia? There was a scene when the toilet was just overflowing with spiders. *shudders* That's why I always have to turn on the light in the bathroom, and check the toilet before I sit down.
I could never watch the movie Arachnaphobia.
The last time I made a guy at work kill a tarantula, he tried to say it wasn't very big too. He was crazy!
There are no such things as small spiders. This was a very close call and I am glad you are all right.
{{hugs}}
MM <--takes these things *very* seriously!
That clears it up. Jen will be sleeping in the garage and Glow will be sleeping in the house.
*walks in*
*throws a spider at Carey*
*leaves*
:D
I *heart* Jen!
I *heart* Ahkie! *smooch*
What's with the time stamp on these posts? They're all outta whack.
I know! They say 11am when it's clearly 2pm. *grin*
Curious. Do you EVER work?
Not if I don't have to, Monsty. *grin*
Carey<----has the best job on earth.
Okay now, there is some kind of weird synchronicity going on here, Carey. I had a HOLY FUCK spider experience this morning at about 4 a.m.
I sort of woke up thinking my hair was poking my eye, so I reached a hand up to brush it away. Instead there was something laying in the corner of my eye. (Remember I wasn't really awake so I wasn't thinking much yet.) So I plucked it and rolled it between my fingers. It made a weird chitinous cracking noise and I tossed it into space. Then I suddenly realized HOLY FUCK IT"S A SPIDER!! And I didn't know where it went!
So I jumped out of bed and looked. Couldn't find it. I started flapping the bedclothes because there might be a wounded and pissed off spider somewhere on my bed.
First the quilt. Flap, flap, flap. Then the blanket. Flap, flap, flap. Finally the sheet. Flap, flap, flap. Tom, bless his heart sleeps through the whole flapping event.
No spider. I get a flashlight and search the bed, the pillows, Tom's body, nothing. I consider waking Tom up but decide to let him sleep in case he gets upset because I threw a wounded spider onto him in the middle of the night.
I sit up in bed for about an hour until he wakes up, then tell him we have to look for a spider. Can't find it. It's gone.
I ask Tom how he could sleep through all the flapping and flashlight stuff. He says he might have seen a light, but it went away.
Today I moved all my bedroon furniture & vacuumed really good. I hope I got that sucker!
LMAO at Swami! I can't believe your DH slept through the whole thing.
Yesterday, while walking to my office, I walked through a cobweb. I'm pretty sure it was a cobweb. Just a single strand but I felt it. The whole afternoon, I had the itchies because I was sure there was a spider crawling all over my body.
LMAO at Swami. I would totally do the vacuum thing too. ACK!!! that is horrible. Just horrible. *shudder*
This is all horrifying. I'm not reading these anymore.
Gee Carey, now that I know you like spiders so much I will tell you my Giant Spiders in India story some day. Or The Giant Centipede in the Dark Story.
*waits for a day when Carey least expects it*
I'm okay with centipedes. The spiders? WAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
You know me better than that, jen. Of course I will get right back to being mean to you. It's what I do. *smooch*
Oh. I see what you mean about the timestamp now. I missed that post about me sleeping in the garage. *evil eye*
*walks away mumbling about how Carey can't even be nice after I spent a week in the hospital*
Michael (DH), is that you?
*snicker* I have to echo Weltek. Wuss!
Now if it had been a snake in the toilet, that would be entirely different. *glares at T-Kitty*
LMAO @ Swami. You MUST tell your India story! I'm surprised Tom didn't wake up right away thinking that you must want sex if you're awake that early. *giggle*
Oh god, please don't tell your India story Swami!
I was trying to remember yesterday who it was that had that experience now I remember it was you. OMH! I think I would have died!
Warn me when you tell it to Carey and I'll hide LOL.
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