Dear Augie
Please don't be mad at me anymore. I made a huge mistake today and I will not even try to blame it on the cold medicine. I had a terrible lapse in judgement and thought I was being funny. *snicker* It was funny. Oooops, I'm apologizing. It was not funny and it was in fact bordering on cruel. I know you are going through a lot right now with Monsty and Glow and Nookie being gone. I'm glad that Breezy was able to comfort you today when I was such a shitty little sistah.
I have decided to back away from my mistake. I will not go near it ever again. I promise you that. It was a horrible joke that went much too far and I have learned my lesson. I hope you'll forgive me. I haven't reached perfection yet, like you have. I guess I just don't learn as quickly as you do. That's why we refer to you as the smartest of them all.
*hangs head*
I have decided to back away from my mistake. I will not go near it ever again. I promise you that. It was a horrible joke that went much too far and I have learned my lesson. I hope you'll forgive me. I haven't reached perfection yet, like you have. I guess I just don't learn as quickly as you do. That's why we refer to you as the smartest of them all.
*hangs head*
posted by Bravie at 2:05 PM
82 Comments:
Dear Carey,
I got your PM, why do you want me to bump that thread? I don't understand. Are you sure? And what did you mean by "keeping this quiet"?
Love,
MM
Dear MM,
What part of "shhhhhhh, don't tell" did you not understand?
Love,
Carey
Dear Carey,
Do I even dare go try to figure this one out?
Love,
Momma
P.S. - Love tastes pretty wonderful, huh? *smooch*
Dear Ayak,
Please lock that godforsaken joke thread that someone keeps bumping, because now that *another* someone *looks at Carey* thought it would be funny to encourage the bumping, we will be seeing that stupid thread on the first page from now until May 2007.
And Ayak, please ban Knockers. It's for her own good. Really it is.
Signed,
Augie, the Exasperated and Cranky one
So... how many of those PM's telling how much the jokes were enjoyed did you guys send?
I only sent 12, I think Carey sent her many more than that. They are really good friends, her and Goldie.
*snort*
You guys are just asking for it.
I mean, I laughed, but you're still asking for it.
I bet Carey sent her a PM, asking her to join us here at blogland, seeing as how they are such good friends. *grin*
Oh gawd! Augie's going to kill me!! I think I just gave the joke queen an idea for another thread!
For someone who loves jokes, that Goldie sure doesn't pick up on it when the joke is on her. *sigh*
Uh, Arkie? You definitely just started another (potential) joke thread! Ooh...you are SO gonna get it!
Dear Carey,
Can you please explain to your new bestest friend exactly how to post new replies to a thread properly? She's taken Ginger's cute little thing and massacred it.
Thank you,
Momma
Did you notice she has TWO threads going? Good grief!
Dear everybody,
I only sent her two PM's. One expressing our interest in the thread and the other with everybody's blog addresses.
I received one PM from a certain mod, banning me from OT.
I hope you're all happy.
*snort*
I checked her profile. She's Canadian!!!!!!
LMAO
This is too funny. I am so tempted...
All you guys simply crack me up.
Anyway, to change the subject for a sec, did you see Melissa Etheridge singing "Ragdoll" to Tina Turner on the Kennedy Center Honors tonight? WOW!
Dear Carey,
You suck.
Love,
Augie
Dear Carey,
You are hilarious!
Love,
Nutz
Dear Augie,
Don't be so cranky.
Love,
Nutz
I think somebody has been busy bumping every thread that was below that just to try and get that thread to page two.
I think that probably won't work. *smirk*
Dear Carey,
You still suck.
Love,
Augie
Also? Ya'll think it's funny, but just wait. When it's the middle of February and that thread is STILL on the front page, it's going to tick you off. Oh yes it will. And you swear you are not going to open it, but you do, because you can't resist. You know you can't.
And when you open it and see that the only person posting to it is Goldie, and that she is up to 1500 posts, it's going to make your brain explode.
I? Will have already been through therapy and will be on my meds. You all? Will be just starting the journey of insanity. And I? Will be laughing my ass off at all of you.
So, you all think it's funny that she keeps adding lame cartoons to that thread? Well, keep encouraging her. I am ready to wait you out.
I am on a quest now. A quest to watch each and every one of you go bonkers. And I will so enjoy it. Yes I will.
*sits and waits*
*sits next to Augie*
Carey, please tell your new friend that she sucks. Thank you.
She may have a cartoon for that too.
Yes, I'm sure she does.
Totally in the dark as to what is being discussed. Color me an idiot!
LOL @ Augie! Here... let me get you a nice little pill.
I? have not even opened that thread except for once yesterday when I saw Carey bump it up.
Vols, it's the "joke to make men's eyes water" thread.
Doc, she is also bumping Bebo's "funny headlines" thread. She seems to be on a quest to post to both of those threads at least once a day, if not more when she gets encouragement.
*stares at Carey*
*stands at attention and salutes*
Reporting for duty Sgt. Knockers. Sir, I have secured a post in the "Men's Watery Eyes" thread to further Operation: Annoy Augie.
I will be awaiting further instructions.
I have instructions for you, TK. Ooops, this is a public place. Nevermind. *grin*
Instructions? Is that code for munching cookies?
*snicker*
And another *smooch* for the cookies. They make a lovely breakfast.
*staying out of it*
Yes it is, TK. *grin*
I'm glad that my cookies have made you happy. That's all I ever wanted. Was for you to eat my cookies and get enjoyment from them. *giggle*
*snort* I am certainly enjoying munching on them. As you know, I have always been a fan of munching on cookies, especially yours.
I suppose, at this point, we should just go ahead and get a room before someone comes in and yells at us.
*giggle* I'm soooo there. I'll bring my cookies.
Dear Carey,
I forgot what I was going to say to Augie. Do you remember?
Love,
Momma
Oh yeah!
Dear Augie,
Can you go bonkers if you are already bonkers? And by "you" I mean me.
Thanks,
Momma
Dear Augie:
Shall I ask her if she has any cat jokes?
Love,
Coco
Not On The Shit List (Yet)
Dear Coco,
That is a for sure way to get on the list.
Dear Carey:
Would you please do your Roseanne Barr imitation? Thank you.
Love,
Coco
PS. Should someone take pity on Augie and PM Goldie to cut it out? Like we need the boards overflowing with cheesy cartoons and pictures.
*grabs crotch, sings National Anthem, spits*
I had thought about, Coco. I was waiting to see where the thread went.
*claps*
Thanks, Carey. I feel better now.
Well, I don't, but I laughed.
Anyway, the lame jokes have got to run dry eventually, but I say anywhere beyond about lunchtime is begging for a PM.
*bows*
I thought they would dry out after the first day. She may have an entire book collection of these things.
I just do not get the appeal. I mean, I am all about the ridiculous behaviour (see: Blog, Monsty's) but canned jokes? Not so much.
*rushing over to see if TKitty really bumped up the thread*
.
.
.
.
.
Yup, she did. *giggles uncontrollably*
Ok, so we're not just keeping this thread on page 1, we're keeping it at # 1 on page 1? Is that the story?
All kidding aside, I'm going to stay away from that thread and hopefully let it die out. *sigh*
Oh good God.
Just when you thought OT couldn't get worse today.
*points at the top of page 1*
I am such a bitch.
*flagellates self*
LMAO. I saw that and ran out of OT as fast as I could.
With all of this talk I might have to visit the OT
FTR, I had nothing to do with that last bump. Yes, my chair is tied to Tkit's chair over here in the corner. But I told her not to post. I tried to pull her away from the thread but she's too strong for me.
I can NOT be blamed for this one.
Tkit deserves to be punished.
Why do I always miss the fun stuff. Dammit Carey, please tell me when there is fun stuff happening.
Boo, there is fun stuff happening right now. *grin*
But now I'm in the deepest of all deep trouble with Augie. *pout*
Uh oh. I came back to my computer, refreshed the thread and saw who posted behind me and thought "Oh.Shit"
I feel as though I am in wicked trouble now.
Do I feel a spanking coming on?
*raises hand*
I volunteer to pass out your punishment. *wicked grin*
and it will be well worth the trouble that I'm in with Augie.
I suspect she has saved every lame joke ever forwarded to her and is now posting them all on OT. I'm quite sure she has an entire 74 GB hard drive full of these things.
HEY! Where did Augie's shit list post go?
She took it away because TK and I were being naughty. *pout*
Well, certainly you're able to reach considering our chairs are tied together. Makes for an easy reach. *wink*
I don't think I have played this much on-line...well, ever! I am sure Augie is thrilled.
*turns red* I actually just snorted out loud at my desk and now people are looking at me. *giggle*
I think you should come and play with me more often. *wink*
Check the handbook. That may or may not be code. *grin*
I kid you not. I had to close the door to my office pretending to have a coughing fit because I keep snorting at my computer.
I promise to come play with you more often (Oooh, that could be code, couldn't it?) but remember, this only happens twice a month or so. Tomorrow, I will be as dull as dishwater. *sigh*
Not if I liquor you up tonight. I know how you are when you're hungover. *grin*
Alas, Carey. I feel it...waning.
*puts back of hand up to forehead in an 'almost fainting' motion*
I am exausted from my efforts today. I must rest. I don't know how you all do it, day in and day out.
*perks up*
Wait! It's past my hour time limit to bump that thread!
*grin*
She is gonna just whack you in a bad way. *giggle*
*smooch*
Oh, and if you faint? I am trained in CPR. *grin*
Actually, I am more interested in your mouth-to-mouth techiniques.
I was a lifeguard/swim instructor for nine years so I know good mouth-to-mouth when I see it.
And I behaved!! I didn't bump it. Do I get gold star or something?
Hmmmmmmm, we can practice our techiniques with each other. Sort of an East coast/ West coast comparison type thing. *wets lips*
Yes you do. That is helping to keep me out of trouble so whatever you want, you got.
Dammit, T-kat, I've been waiting for you to bump the thread! I keep going back, hitting refresh, waiting, waiting, waiting - and NOTHING!
How much longer do I have to wait???
I haven't been taking very good notes. Are we supposed to have negative feelings towards Goldie, or just be annoyed that she bumps the thread and posts all the jokes?
Is it okay if I think a couple are really funny? I think Santa on the witness stand being accused of calling a woman a "Ho" is really funny!
And what's up with Zombies pickle? Does that come into play at all?
And should I post this comment in letter format?
Thank you for your time.
TK, remember, if you don't bump that thread, I'll give you anything you want. ANYTHING!!!!!
No negative feelings on my part. Just slightly annoyed. Not even sure annoyed is the right word. More like bothered. Not hot and bothered, just bothered. More of an *eye roll* kind of bothered.
But! *whines* MTW's taunting me!
And here I was searching for another blonde joke to post.
I will continue to behave and honor your *whispers Augie's* wishes in this matter.
But the rewards for you being good will be so much better than if you posted. *evil grin*
*runs in and spanks Carey and TKitty*
There you are. I've been waiting for a good spanking all day. *grin*
*pouts*
Lightsy didn't spank me. :(
So it was good for you then, Carey?
*spanks MTW* Happy now? *grin*
*sigh* I have been so bored all day. And I wanted to play, but I have not been able to think of a flinging-flanging thing to say.
So, um. Hi.
Brilliant, aren't I?
PS- Goldie irritates me muchly.
Jen, that never stopped me. *points to Monsty's blog*
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