Two things I'm sick of today
1. Lesbians
2. Fruit
And I'm not sure which one I am more sick of at this point.
I started the cabbage soup diet today. Today's menu consists of nothing but cabbage soup and fruit. Fruit, fruit and more fucking fruit. I am NOT a huge eater of fruit. So an entire day of it has been a nightmare. I had kiwi, strawberries, a nectarine, a grapefruit, an apple and an orange. So far. I have more fruit at home and more cabbage soup. Tomorrow is veggie day and I CAN.NOT.WAIT. I love my veggies. Can never have too many of them. Fruit? I'm sick of it.
My office is full of lesbians. Big (by big, I don't necessarily mean obese. Two of them are actually quite tiny) dykey butch lesbians. All loud, all obnoxious, all acting like they are all that. I've never seen so much flannel and so many mullets assembled in one office building. I shouldn't have worn a tight t-shirt and jeans today. They all keep looking at me and it's making me uncomfortable. Stop looking at me. Nice soft butch lesbians are okay, lipstick lesbians are okay. They can look all they want. But the butchy ones make me uncomfortable. I feel like they are behind closed doors saying "I could gobble that one right up". They have to go out of their way to pass by my desk. My desk is not in the open part of the office. So in order to pass by my desk, they have to go out of their way. And everytime, they walk by and smile and stare.
ACK!!! SEE???? One just did it again. Waaaaaah. Make them leave.
*grin*
ETA: I just realized the association between the two things I am sick of. Fruit and lesbians. *giggle* FTR, I am not sick of gay men (fruit) today.
2. Fruit
And I'm not sure which one I am more sick of at this point.
I started the cabbage soup diet today. Today's menu consists of nothing but cabbage soup and fruit. Fruit, fruit and more fucking fruit. I am NOT a huge eater of fruit. So an entire day of it has been a nightmare. I had kiwi, strawberries, a nectarine, a grapefruit, an apple and an orange. So far. I have more fruit at home and more cabbage soup. Tomorrow is veggie day and I CAN.NOT.WAIT. I love my veggies. Can never have too many of them. Fruit? I'm sick of it.
My office is full of lesbians. Big (by big, I don't necessarily mean obese. Two of them are actually quite tiny) dykey butch lesbians. All loud, all obnoxious, all acting like they are all that. I've never seen so much flannel and so many mullets assembled in one office building. I shouldn't have worn a tight t-shirt and jeans today. They all keep looking at me and it's making me uncomfortable. Stop looking at me. Nice soft butch lesbians are okay, lipstick lesbians are okay. They can look all they want. But the butchy ones make me uncomfortable. I feel like they are behind closed doors saying "I could gobble that one right up". They have to go out of their way to pass by my desk. My desk is not in the open part of the office. So in order to pass by my desk, they have to go out of their way. And everytime, they walk by and smile and stare.
ACK!!! SEE???? One just did it again. Waaaaaah. Make them leave.
*grin*
ETA: I just realized the association between the two things I am sick of. Fruit and lesbians. *giggle* FTR, I am not sick of gay men (fruit) today.
posted by Bravie at 1:18 PM
13 Comments:
Want a peach? *grin*
*snort* Now that? Was hilarious to me. *smooch*
I have my moments. *grin*
*saaa-mooooooch*
Aww, I'm sorry Carey. FWIW, I'm not a lesbian, but *I'd* walk past your desk if I could, too. Why not blow them a kiss or something, and make them uncomfortable?
And good lord, that's a lot of fruit you've eaten. <--not code
That delete was me. I'm going to try this again.
Cabbage soup? *gag* I need to lose a few pounds but I am NOT going to try that diet. I'm not a big fruit eater either. <--- not code
We grocery shopped after work. I had to buy something to substitute for smoking. For after supper I have little chocolate/caramel cups. For snacking I have watermelon, strawberries and globe grapes. And chips and dip. I should probably just start smoking again.
I miss having a lesbian in my office. Acutally, there's one specific lesbian I wish worked in my office. *giggle* There could be a lesbian or two out in the plant but I haven't been out there much to know much about the plant workers. This just reminded me of something to blog about.
How about a banana?
So...exactly what kind of lesbian are you? And are you sick of yourself today, as well?
Momma <--- apparently much more ignorant in lesbionese than previously thought.
P.S. - if you'd *kick* those lesbians more often and *kick* me less, you might be much happier.
Do you have any pineapple? I want some.
IIRC, twas not so long ago that YOU had a mullet, my dear. *giggle*
So, does this mean I CAN or CAN'T oogle you? Since I'm not a butch lesbian, it's ok, right?
Perhaps they are drawn to all the succulent fruit sucking? Offer them cabbage soup. Insist on it.
Today is Veggie Day! How about a big 'ol cucumber.
Bravie doesn't have a mullet?
*sobs with shattered dreams*
Ack. I could never go on that diet. I would imagine your work area is a little more "fragrant" today after eating the cabbage soup. That may deter those butches from walking in your area. :-)
Excellent point Nookie. *snort*
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